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View Full Version : A new beginning.


Bamy
18th March 2005, 12:45 PM
that was a really good start. there are some punctuatiion errors but if you did knock it out in 10 minutes that was inevitable. I really hope you add to the story - like adding the repercussions of the girl doing what she did, how the healers help the little queen and the fuss made about her through her weyrling stages.

Monkeysrule
12th April 2005, 05:49 AM
And put the dragon quotes in italics. It's kinda confusing. But the dragon POV is cool!!

Monkeysrule
17th April 2005, 07:16 AM
I want more!!!