Bully!

[JayEgo]

Something I was subjected to at school on almost a daily basis was bullying. I was one of those kids. Glasses on my nose, braces on my teeth, weird parents (hippy/heavy types!) and generally a liking for the geekier things in life (chess club, library, etc...) I suppose I was Hermione from Harry Potter but with less inteligence :roll:

Anyway, having been subject to this for so long, I think I've come out of things remarkably well. I was always fairly well adjusted. Seemed to take most things in my stride and just deal with and get on with life. Others I know are not so fortunate.

Anyway, recently, the BBC's Nationwide radio station - Radio One - started a campaign to 'Beat Bullying' and I took a small amount of note at these snippets of info (http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio1/onelife/personal/index.shtml?bullying#topics). Although as stated, No harm done in my case, it can be devastating for others and I figured it wouldn't hurt to promote my belief that Bullying is wrong by applying for and wearing the [/url][url="http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio1/onelife/fun/freebies.shtml"]Blue wrist band (http://Blue%20Band), which have unfortunately all gone now! (Mine arrived today!)

And then it got me thinking, how widespread is bullying?

So, lets see how we all faired...

Vote, comment and make your feelings known...

...That's not bullying you into action is it? :roll:

Ja¥son xx

Poll set for four weeks or thereabouts!

[granath]

I was a sensitive child. I was frozen out more than actively bullied. Some idiots did call me names as well, but I was never the only one singled out for bullying, fortunately. I didn't enjoy school much for that reason. One of those smart kids who get good grades without really trying, but I just wasn't popular.

[Kitsch]

Sadly I was bullied a great deal :cry:

[Apocalypse]

From what I remember, I was part of a pretty relaxed year-group. There was a small amount of bullying going on, but it dried up pretty fast. As it turned out, there were enough 'groups' for everyone to fit into.

There was 1 girl who 'hated' me for about a week, but I didn't pay her any attention and she got over it. :good:

[JayEgo]

I was a sensitive child. I was frozen out more than actively bullied. Some idiots did call me names as well, but I was never the only one singled out for bullying, fortunately. I didn't enjoy school much for that reason. One of those smart kids who get good grades without really trying, but I just wasn't popular.There's a saying... The Best Days of your Life?

Bollocks!

Kids can be crueler than adults, if less destructive than those who have their fingers on the triggers and buttons!

Hugs to you both! :hugs:

Ja¥son xx

[C_ris]

I wasn't really bullied per se, just never really very popular. I got on with most people. but there were those few really really annoying childish bullies who pick on people just because.


But considering that most of those didn't even get into Sixth form, then I'm pretty certain that I shall do better than them in life!

[Priscilla]

There is always that, isn't there C_ris!? The best way to get even is to do REALLY well?! :devil: I don't remember being bullied until I got to middle school age (10 to about 13). Before that I went to a small elementary school and we were all neighbors and friends. Middle school dumped everyone from the whole town together and there were the "haves" and the "have nots". I was part of the have not group, and we got teased for our clothes, hair, anything that was different. I survived though! My son got teased terribly his first year of high school. However, in his case, he got his "revenge" by graduating fourth in his class, going on to a top college with scholarship, and having a good solid group of friends by the time he graduated. Bullying is disgusting, it starts as early as pre-school and in many cases I've seen it's the parents who encourage it by telling their kids to hit back if they are hit, and by modeling angry behaviour and foul language in front of them at home. "If mom and dad do it, it must be okay, right?!" :banghead:

[Lara]

I was never actually bullied, but I was a bit of a Hermione, so got called a "swot" by some of the less academic kids! As I had plenty of imagination, I would organise pranks for my friends to play, and then write them up in the form of parodies of whatever we were studying in literature at the time. I admit to having had a very happy school life, and also gave any bullies a hard time. I was quite well-liked, which helped to spread the message that bullying was despicable, and unacceptable.

[Nurianna]

Mom and I moved alot while I was little.. we counted up one time that I attended 25 school systems in 4 states.. so I was always the new girl, and my name very old fashioned so I was often teased and tormented (cause it got a rise outta me~) about my clothes (often thrift-store and hand-me-downs) and my name~ Alma= Alpo (brand name dog food), Elmo, Elmer, Elmer Fudd, Fudduddy and others.. Two school fights, one I got hauled into the principal with the bully the other I fast talked my way out of~ (4th, 6th)

the worst bullying I ever had was during my 8th grade year, we had actually been in one place for 2 1/2 years and I had friends.. I was definately among the 'have nots' and my best friend was in band, (she was part of the slightly have betters) During one of the Band Candy sales she shared with me one of her candy bars (I didnt have the dollar, and wasnt gonna anytime soon) later the same day her locker was broken into and all the candy stolen. The vice-principal hauled me into his office and loudly accused me of stealing from my best friend! (I have to mention here, He and my mom had already had words about me and he was pushing for anything he could expell me on, he contantly followed and watch me plus a few others)

I was terrified~ and clueless~ and I got Mad! I yelled back at him loud enough to pull in the principal and told him that I was not a theif! (as a child this might have been the only time I really stood up for myself)
The idiot blew it, he told me then that I was worthless trash and because he'd seen me eat one earlier and that I could 'obviously' not afford it, I must have stolen them. I told him that Donna had shared one with me and I didn't touch the others.. he asked me "If not you, then who did it?" I told him that I saw two of the big boys messing with a locker combo earlier but I wasnt positive that it was Donna's locker, so I hadn't said anything to anyone. The principal told him to check it out. (I'd rememberd then what the boys looked like and kinda who they were, -trouble- ) Turns out I was right, the vp caught them with the candy and he had to come back and appologize to me..
and I could tell that he truely hated having to applogize~ very soon after that I moved away~ my grades went from d's and e's (failing) to b's and a's by the end of the year.

bullying comes in all forms... my ex bullied me for years~ now his GF bullies him... Karma does work~

gotta work,, better quit rambling~ :D

[prekharper]

Yeah, occasionally.
At some times in my life, more than occasionally.

Now, however, I'm the person everyone turns to when "someone should speak out about this!"

[Mausey]

Not bullied so much as teased a bit. But looking back, we all teased each other so I think it pretty much evened out. :D

[Shadow*]

I admit to being bullied occassionally. Primary school was okay but when I went to High School (2 tier system in Scotland) there was a lot of splitting up of previous friends into 'houses' as well as the usual mix-up of kids from several different areas.

I consider myself to have been average in about everything, never was one to be a part of a clique in school, tended to be the one that previous primary school chums came and asked advice from, even years on.

As far as the bullying was concerned....names never hurt me (well, not on the outside), I tended to put up a front by acting as though their comments were beneath my notice, which no doubt irritated them horrendously. If 'push came to shove' then the bullies soon learned a hard lesson - appearances can be deceptive! Not the ideal way to stop it happening, but at the time it seemed like the only option. I think I ended up receiving more hassle from defending other 'victims' than on my own account.

I had a younger brother and sister who followed behind me through High School, the same happened to them, although to a lesser extent, apparently, due to my 'reputation', which funnily enough I only found out about this week - almost 20+ yrs on. :roll: I always thought I was reasonably quiet and unassuming. :angel:

[Shazza]

I hated school. Not because of the teachers or because the work was hard but because bullies made my life HELL.

From the earliest days of school life I was teased. In primary school I was "Sharon the Big Fat Baron". Later in primary school I was "Bubbles". You see I had the audacity to physically develop earlier than the other girls. That was bad enough but I coped. High school was a whole different experience. I was bashed twice, intimidated on a regular basis. My locker was broken into on a regular basis and my belongings stolen or destroyed. As a result I was nothing more than an average student. Mother wanted me to finish my higher education and I told her point blank, get me out of the this town and I will finish. We left and I finally found myself at a school where I wasn't bullied and actually had a great bunch of friends. Still didn't finish though, but that is another story.

You know, right up until the last few years I thought I was just average, bordering on dumb, until I went to University. There I achieved amazingly high scores. To this day I tend to feel the tutors were being nice to be, despite being told more than once that like me or not, they don't hand out good marks like candy. These days I regularly score well over 80% in most of my work. HAH! Wonder what those bullies are doing now! :devil: Took me nearly 30 years to discover I am a worthwhile person.

My daughter, most of you know her as LandraC, is a whole different person. Man she has some spunk and regularly gives as good as she gets. No one has managed to physically touch her because with her mouth they can't be sure what she can do with her fists. One girl called her fat one day and she laughed in the girl's face, pulled up her shirt and said to her friends "Is this fat or what?" Damn I am proud of her.

[wulfin]

i *was* a bully (and still kind of am.....). In grade 2 i was nearly suspended for it, and in gr. 4 i WAS suspended for giving a noogie to a grade 6er until his scalp began to bleed (oops).

In kindergarden/gr 1 i was often picked on, but i soon learned that if i fought back they wouldn't bug me...and took that a step further. By the time i was in grade 3 the other kids were "hiring me" to guard the playground (each grade was assigned certain times they could be using the equipment on the playground..it was my "job" to ensure kids in other grades didn't sneak on).

Pretty sad... but then, i also felt sorry for the kid in gr. 6 going home having to tell his parents that a younger girl hurt him...........

[AnnMarie]

When I started school, I was one of the three smallest girls in class, and evberyone knew my mother expected me to be a lady...no fighting. So, I got bullied... until the day my mother told me in front of the bully that I could fight back. No problems after that.

Middle school..I actually got a rock bounced off my head. I still refused to let the girl take my tamborine. In fact, I just kept walking. Her friend told her to back off.

High school, I got aslong with most of the school. I wasn't in any one "group". That might have been the reason I didn't get bullied.

[JayEgo]

Shazza... I don't know if you can look back on the names now and laugh, I know I can, and yours is a hoot if you can see past the hurt it must have caused but it sounds to me like you had a similar time as I did... I think it was about nine years I went through, dreading everyday until I was too numb to care much more. I worked out strategies to keep out of the way though, it doesn't sound like you had the kind of school that this was possible in! We had no lockers, so all our stuff was kept with us. Nothing to break into! Nothing to steal really either... I wasn't froma particularly well off family and so had to make do with basics... something else which didn't really help!

Sorry for bring this up! :sorry: There's a lot of pain actually showing in this thread! :hugs:

Ja¥son xx

[Shazza]

While I can't actually look back and laugh I do view my experiences as being important to making me who I am now. I dare anyone to try and bully me NOW. Not only do I give as good as I get, I tend to go one better. Nothing beats a bully like an intelligent put down.

I didn't have a great many belongings but with an alcoholic mother and no father (another very long story), I could not afford to lose what I did have. I mean you can imagine turning up to class without textbooks or even writing implements. Oh and I forgot to mention the "hand me down" school uniforms. Poor, fat AND well endowed. I was an incident waiting to happen.

As for being sorry you brought up the topic, don't be. It is the secrecy that surrounds bullying that allows it continue. Only by being open about it can we hope to defeat it.

Jay honey, I for one THANK YOU, for bringing up the subject. :kiss:

[carmella]

I was bullied in the 6th and 7th grade because I was overweight. When I went to 8th in the highschool, I grew 4 inches and had learned how to disappear in the large classes.


I watched a program about people in their 30's who were still upset about what happened in school. I couldn't believe it. I started telling my Jr. Hi. kids about my experiences and telling them life goes on don't get stuck in school. I've been fat; I've been thin and my real friends just like me.

[Madrigal]

The one time it got physical I managed to black one of the bully's eyes and smash his nose in with a rock. I did get suspended for a week... until I spoke to the headmaster, who told me actually thought the bully had had it coming for awhile, if not *quite* that violently.

After that, he tried to retaliate. I framed him for something he didn't do--cheating on a midterm--and he got expelled. Two others who I didn't frame but who had participated in the gropefest somehow got dragged along. I didn't exactly decide to clear their names, and still have absolutely no regrets.

After that I was frozen out a bit, but didn't really care. The one time one of the girls decided to knock over a carton of milk on me, I went, got a rag, mopped it up... and proceeded to wring it out over her head. No regrets their either. The teacher told me he'd have done the same thing, then proceeded to say he'd been looking away when it happened and just thought it an unfortunate mistake.

There was one more rather interesting experiment, again involving groping, though this time by a teacher. I couldn't get evidence for that, so I made some up and got him fired, too.

Nobody messed with me at all beyond that at my old school. Then I transferred, and have had no problems since. I'm something of a loner--always will be, don't tend to like people that much--but on the average I'm well-respected.

[Greenrider Tresa]

Yep, I was bullied right up to 10th grade...first being picked on for being smaller, I think. Had one idiot 8th grade teacher who tried to convince me that the boys were pushing me around and throwing spitballs and stuff cause they LIKED me. But I suspected she didn't like me either...Can be sure I didn't pay any attention to her.
Sometimes I would throw spitballs and snowballs and small stones right back at them, and swear at them in Spanish just because I wanted to annoy them. Cochino was a favorite.. .<EG> and calling teenage boys ninos - little boys! Also called them ugly...
Other times, I'd pretend they didn't exist. In high school, a few of the girls got in on it, in one of the classes I was mainstreamed into. Guess she was jealous of my getting extra attention or something. Told her that cochina meant disgusting girl, and that's what she was.
It finally cooled off after one of the boys pushed me down hard enough that I thought I'd cracked my head literally. But I had already learned to block pain for other reasons that year, or at least ignore it, so I got right back up and screamed at him. Ohh....satisfaction is sweet! He and his budy, the main bullies, got expelled.

So, for any of you who think that all teenagers in special education are sweet and innocent and kind, get rid of that notion right now! We're all still human, not saints and angels. :) Not that I think anyone here thinks that way, but I know some people do.




Tresa

[ladyholdermara]

I been bullied lol had my face washed out with snow,, pushed, pulled, even picked up by my ears oh yeah and can't forget the pile ons lol


Actually the most memorable bully incident was one where I stood up for myself, this girl kept wanting to goad me into a fight and did all she could and I wouldn't, one day I told her to f-off lol said it JUST like that too cause I was only 12 and I was a GOOD girl. She came after me and man did I shinny up a tree REAL fast. She stood there for like 10 minutes yelling at me to come down too lol well the next day she came up to me without her friends and told me that she respected me for standing up for myself but STILL not willing to fight BUT she could never acknowledge that in front of her friends :) she never bothered me again tho. So I guess it did the trick.

I tell my kids that story to teach them that fighting never solves anything.

[Lone Dragon]

Ah yes the bullies that make school much worse. Ive been nullied alot up until my Junior year when a lot of people knew me and matured. Some people bully because they have problems with themselves, or have to keep an image. Some bullies change and become good people or become friends with those theyve bullied. Then again a lot of bullies push other kids around for evil purposes thats most of the bullies ive dealt with, they do it because they have evil hearts. I may be overexadurating, but thats what i observed

[Bronze-Dragonrider]

I got bullied ALL the time. ever since kindergarten. Sometimes it was innocent teasing, and other times blatant abuse. I was a shrimp, had glasses, nerdy, and some of the teachers were bullies too :cry: Got to be so much I went on homeschooling, and not long after that I hit a growth spurt :evil:

[Dawn]

I was bullied not so much physically, but verbally. I was a very sensitive, painfully shy, quiet, stay-to-myself child. It didn't help that I was chubby and started wearing glasses at age 6 either. From the time I started school, I got called names and taunted. I quickly learned not to give them the satisfaction of a response and ignored them - so then I was labeled a snob. :roll:

Junior high (age 11-13) was the worst time - it was constant then. But that's also when I found a great group of friends to hang out with. We stuck together all through high school and that helped a lot! High school was actually pretty good. By then, most people had grown tired of picking on me and went after the new kids instead.

[dae]

i was bullied in my first 7 years of school but when i got to high school i sort of got a goth look all dark and evil so they kept away from me

[Elisabetha]

Some of these stories sound very familiar to me. I too was bullied, from age 6 up to age 15 at which point it suddenly stopped. In fact so suddenly that it took me a while to figure out it had stopped.
The bullying started because I was different, I came from a different part of the country than most people in my school, so I spoke different, also my mother made my clothes (something that she was very good in, but they could still see it). Because of the bullying I became a very shy person, always trying to make myself invisible and unnoticed. I think partly because of this attitude the bullying continued through all the classes of the first school I was in (age 6 to 12) and the pattern continued when I went to high school. Where the bullying changed from just verbal to physical as well, and where one teacher who saw me being kicked repeatedly in the back during his class didn't do anything, he just smiled and ignored it. Something that the boys who were kicking me also noticed and took for permission to make things even worse. This teacher is the one person that I would still, after all these years, like to have a conversation with. To ask him why he ignored that and wether or not he was aware that by ignoring them he made me believe that there was nothing I could do and nothing anybody else was going to do to stop it.
When the bullying stopped it took me a while to realize what was happening and to get used to not being bullied anymore, to learn to be more assertive and speak out for myself. Or just to speak during classes when I was not first asked anything by the teacher. I stayed in that school untill I was 18 and eventhough I was not bullied anymore since I was 15 there were still the effects of being bullied in my behaviour and attitude. For example, if when riding my bike people behind me (whom I did not even know) would laugh I felt certain they were laughing about me. My whole posture sort of reflected that as I always walked with my head down, still trying not to be noticed.
It took moving to a different town to go to university to change me. To stop me from feeling like people were laughing at me all the time and to learn to carry my head high.

I hated my time in school and it is still not a nice memory for me, but I do think that I have come out stronger because of it. People don't get away with trying to bully me, or walk over me anymore. I speak up for myself and I just don't allow them to do that anymore.

I do believe talking about bullying helps. If the people who are bullying other people read / hear about what it does to a person maybe they will stop. I also think that it really helps people to know they are not the only ones being bullied, to know that they should ask for help if they can't take the problem away themselves. Just because one teacher didn't help, doesn't mean all of them will turn their backs on you and laugh. So I don't mind you asking Jayson.

:bouncy: :bouncy: :bouncy:

[Brezo3]

Guess I'm one of those lucky people. I never got bullied, unless you count getting chased by the boys who liked me on the playground :roll: . I can honestly that I've never bullied anyone either cuz I'm a nice person most of the time. :)

:note: Heather

[Madrigal]

In defense of those teachers who don't do anything:

It's a question of damned if you do, damned if you don't. When you tell the bullies to cut it out, the kid only comes back and says nobody talks to him because he's the teacher's pet. Hitting you can usually do something about; freezing out, there's nothing that can be done. By second grade (the level I've been interning at for the past two years) the kids have a very firm idea of who's going to be the ringleader and who's going to be the one to get picked on. The more you step in, the more the kid gets isolated. The more you don't do anything, the more the kid gets isolated. The most you'd be able to prevent is hitting.

I've seen it before from all three sides--bullied when younger at school, the bully at summer camp (I'll be the first to admit that, I was not a very nice child), and from the side of the teachers. The bullies are often expected to do it by their peers, and peer pressure is the one thing a bully will listen to every single time. The bullied kids are the only ones who can deal with it--and in the cases where it's not fighting, that's usually by a transfer away. (It's funny. They'll protest it. After a time it gets to the point where they expect to be treated that way by everyone else, and automatically isolate themselves when put into a group of new kids.)

[j_mercuryuk]

i was never really bullied either, i wasn't popular, but i just got left alone.
i did send about 3 yrs with almost no friends at school through (primary). i'd only play with other kids afew times during those years. i just ran around the playground instead, got good at running through :D

[Greenrider Tresa]

I never was a bully, was bullied a few times, but then I had my big bro with me :evil: I did threatened people, but never did much than the bluff because it works.. they usually teased me, or did something that needs disapline

Glad that it worked for you, Devcca. I never found a method that really did any good, until I managed to get those two boys suspended. <EG> The very last person who tried to bother me found out she was a nonentity and playing outside her league, however...just a silly 7th grader...got no place trying to bother an 11th grader anyhow. ;)


Tresa

[Greenrider Tresa]

In defense of those teachers who don't do anything:

It's a question of damned if you do, damned if you don't. When you tell the bullies to cut it out, the kid only comes back and says nobody talks to him because he's the teacher's pet. Hitting you can usually do something about; freezing out, there's nothing that can be done. By second grade (the level I've been interning at for the past two years) the kids have a very firm idea of who's going to be the ringleader and who's going to be the one to get picked on. The more you step in, the more the kid gets isolated. The more you don't do anything, the more the kid gets isolated. The most you'd be able to prevent is hitting.

I've seen it before from all three sides--bullied when younger at school, the bully at summer camp (I'll be the first to admit that, I was not a very nice child), and from the side of the teachers. The bullies are often expected to do it by their peers, and peer pressure is the one thing a bully will listen to every single time. The bullied kids are the only ones who can deal with it--and in the cases where it's not fighting, that's usually by a transfer away. (It's funny. They'll protest it. After a time it gets to the point where they expect to be treated that way by everyone else, and automatically isolate themselves when put into a group of new kids.)


Very true, though I didn't transfer just because of the bullying, which had followed me through one transfer already. And by that point I figured if it was gong to happen while changing countries, then changing cities wasn't going to make any difference.
I've always only had a few friends, and found out I belonged in my school in 11th-12th grades when I had not belonged anywhere else. I'm still cautious around people I don't know, I'm shy, but I can speak up more now. I can still just cease to care what people think of me, it's their problem, not mine and if they don't like me then I don't have to be around them.



Tresa

[Ravien Coromana]

In 2nd grade, i wa bullied by a bunch of people, bu i had powerful friens, and i turned the bullies on each oter.

[Beisla]

I was bullied in grades 6 through 9, after we moved back from the States. I was never part of the 'in' crowd, but somehow I just didn't fit in anymore and became really quiet at school. In the sixth grade it was mostly just freezing out, but in the next school there was a lot of verbal bullying. Luckily I had three or four close friends at school also, though they weren't in my class. One of the reasons the bullying never really got to me outside of school was that I spent a lot of time at the stables, where I was trusted and had a lot of friends.

After 9th grade the bullying stopped, probably because the bullies either outgrew it or finally realized I really didn't care that I was the way I was.

I agree about teachers being in a tough situation. Once at school the teacher talked to the whole class, minus me, and I think I'd rather he hadn't, though it didn't really have any effect one way or the other.

[Elisabetha]

I once got into a fight with my father in law. He is a teacher for children in the ages 6 - 12. He said that in his class there was no bullying. I told him that there probably was no (or not much) physical bullying going on, but that the freezing out and the name calling were there. He wouldn't believe me, I then told him that the worst bullying I went through was by girls who would tell me in a sweet voice (dripping with poisson) what nice trousers I had. After a long conversation he admitted that he probably was unaware of things like that going on.
I do agree that it is almost impossible for a teacher to stop that kind of bullying, but they should stop the physical abuse if they are aware of it.

[Elisabetha]

After a time it gets to the point where they expect to be treated that way by everyone else, and automatically isolate themselves when put into a group of new kids.

That is exactly what happened to me Madrigal. I think a transfer only works when the child is ready to believe that being bullied is not his / her own fault.

[Apocalypse]

I once got into a fight with my father in law. He is a teacher for children in the ages 6 - 12. He said that in his class there was no bullying. I told him that there probably was no (or not much) physical bullying going on, but that the freezing out and the name calling were there. He wouldn't believe me, I then told him that the worst bullying I went through was by girls who would tell me in a sweet voice (dripping with poisson) what nice trousers I had. After a long conversation he admitted that he probably was unaware of things like that going on.
I do agree that it is almost impossible for a teacher to stop that kind of bullying, but they should stop the physical abuse if they are aware of it.

That's a really good point. Unless you've been the victim/bully you don't really know all the ways kids use to hurt eachother.... teachers are so busy teaching that it's hard to spot the subtle things.... :noface:

[Emmy]

I was bullied a fair bit.
Again, I was a have not, I smelled funny (we now put it mostly down to lactose intolerance and the smelly stuff I had to put on my skin to treat eczema - we worked out that i had lactose intolerance because someone realised that at my sickest I smelled like off milk!), I wore funny hand-me-down clothes or a school uniform when it wasn't compulsory, and I was tiny and SKINNY.
I also had three younger sisters, and most people knew that my mother was on a single mothers pension (so most people assumed that we had different dads, though that isn't the case). We also moved a bit too - until high school I'd never spent more than two years at the same school.
I was also very shy and a bit tomboyish (more tomboyish as a teenager). Until I was in Grade 5 I wasn't very good at much at school apart from spelling. Then after that I suddenly "got it" and became one of the smartest in the class.
So until then, I was teased for not being smart, and after then I was a snob, and too good for everyone else.
My clothes were a running joke, and people would pretend to be my friend for an afternoon then say nasty things in front of me and their friends (or repeat/twist things I had said in confidence).
As I got older, there was less bullying and more freezing out. I think they'd gotten so used to excluding me, that even when they'd forgotten what my 'failings' were, they still didn't want to include me.

Funnily enough, I came across one of the girls who did this to me recently. She's now a teacher. She actually apologised for her behaviour, as she has now seen from the teacher's point of view just how nasty it was - although she didn't realise it at the time.

I also spoke to one of my teachers - who didn't realise what had been going on - she'd put it down to my 'spikiness', saying that I was often snappish with these girls, when all she saw was that they were trying to be friendly - so I told her about how they would pretend to be my friends etc. I also told her about how I'd come into the classroom (with the teacher there already) and sit in the only available seat - which would be in the middle of their group, and they'd all get up and move their chairs to other tables which had no seats next to them, or they would tell me that I couldn't have the chair because they were saving it for someone - when there was noone else in the class they could be saving it for. The teacher said that she'd never seen this, and asked why i didn't tell anyone. The thing was, I had, but had just been told that I had to deal with it myself.
I was also bullied at home, but I wont go into that.

[Apocalypse]

snp
I was also bullied at home, but I wont go into that.

That's another good point - school isn't the only place you can be bullied....

[Lisa Lewis]

I was occasionally bullied and made fun of because I was quiet, not athletic and had a different type of name.... golschneider.... (I also :blush: had a small bad habit of picking my nose.... No, I don't do that anymore) so I was called goldsnots and other type of names... Also, I went to the same school district my whole school career.....1 small town where whatever reputation you had in elementary school it was with you all the way through high school. Although in high school to get enough students to warrent a high school in our area we pulled 3 towns together to get the classes... That's when I started opening up and found a really good friend who came from one of the other towns. She's the one who helped my get over my shy-ness and got me into doing crazy but safe things.... like going tothe movies and on the way home seeing some cute guys walking down the street and calling and honking at them :)

[Stewart]

as a kid i moved down to england in the 70s and got bullied because i was a scot the bulling was very violent. as i was also a small kid.every one picked on the scots dxxk the hatred was very bad for the scots in the 70s in england .my mum told the headmaster but all he did was say he would talk to the kids concerned and did nothing.then in the late 70s we moved back up to scotland and i started my secondry education and within days i was bullied again because i spoke with an english accent this went on for 6 months until one day i snaped and told the bullies i would take them all on .bigger fool me but i had enough .so the day came about and i took out all the bullies there were 3 of them i had descoverd my ancestrial temper. im of german irish scots decent but i swore no one would bully me again and they never did funny though im now married to a wonderful english lady and very happy. :wave:

[woollymouse]

I was bullied in the first two years of middle school (it stopped coz I moved schools, not because of the bully but because my parents wanted us to go to a certain Secondary school and the best way to do it was to move schools). Then more or less right through Secondary School. Strangely enough it was by the same bully. She ended up at the same secondary school as me. However, I did get my revenge a few times getting trpped in the locker room by a group of teenagers is not a nice experience and it really irrated me so I hit back. On of the bullies got expelled for that incident it's just a shame it wasn't the ring leader. I admit it hurt at the time and my self confidence took a huge battering (I'm only just getting my confidence back now)but thinking back I won in the end as I'm the one with the better qualifications and probably the better life style.

[Madrigal]

as a kid i moved down to england in the 70s and got bullied because i was a scot the bulling was very violent. as i was also a small kid.every one picked on the scots

That's one thing I've never encountered at the schools I've been to. Then again, we've got embassy-staff kids from everywhere... speak with an accent and most people are like 'hey, cool.' The only exceptions are the poor Texans. We tease them mercilessly.

(Don't worry. It's a friendly rivalry; they never fail to play whatever pranks on the rest of us they can manage and call us Washingtonians flip-flops.)

[Lady Legira]

I was bullied for the 5 years I was at secondary school, by the time I left I had no self esteem, little confidence and was very shy.

Now I'm none of those, thanks to alot of love :heartbeat

[Caerwyddyn]

Yep,




I was bullied also...
BIGTIME ! - a Welsh girl, trying to fit-in in Australia ???
(whom didn't even speak more than a few words of english)

How stupid !

I've studied now, and know why the bullies do what they do, but it's real hard to forgive........

Interestingly - it's amazing that those whom were bullied seem also to be those who've made the most of their lives and education!!!
Go US ! :ok:



BUT,


If I could do it all again?
I'd choose to be Popular ! :shake:

[Faren]

Wow, guys. I feel so bad for y'all. :hugs: I really had no idea things like this went on. Guess that makes me very naive. :blush: I realize now how lucky I was NOT to be bullied. I was always one of the smartest in my class, but I was still popular and ended up being a cheerleader and all that cr*p. But I never bullied anyone either...I had friends in many different "groups".

Reading your stories though makes me concerned about one of my children. I think perhaps he's experiencing some bullying...yeah, he's the one who's arm was broken at school right before Christmas break by some boys who were playing a bit too rough. :mad2: So thanks for sharing your experiences because I'm going to seriously look at what's going on with him.:group:

[Kitsch]

I think my being bullied is still affecting me today. I am almost pathetically anxious to please people to avoid confrontation and end up being taken advantage of quite a lot. My self confidence is still pretty much at zero level and I am very insecure.

:(

[C_ris]

I think my being bullied is still affecting me today. I am almost pathetically anxious to please people to avoid confrontation and end up being taken advantage of quite a lot. My self confidence is still pretty much at zero level and I am very insecure.

:(
:group: Kitty!

I have got a lot more self-confident since coming to Uni, where I ahve been ablwe to be myself with absolutely no preconceptions in anyone's mind here, as we all started from sctratch.

[Bamy]

i was bullied mentally on a daily basis because i was over weight, read too many books and was smarter than most people in the school - was even bullied by the spanish teacher - but i got my own back on him - pervy get.

[Bamy]

it did not help that i am naturally shy (though i put up a very good bold front) and am not very good with people

[Bamy]

i can actually pinpoint the cause of my problems because in primary school i was very smart and was skipped ahead a year at one point. they kept me in the same year for 2 years to let the others catch up. i lost all of my friends in the year i had been in and was considered 'too young' by those in the year i was skipped to. i am also slowly gaining my self confidence back but it is a slow process.

[Elisabetha]

Wow, guys. I feel so bad for y'all. :hugs: I really had no idea things like this went on. Guess that makes me very naive. :blush: I realize now how lucky I was NOT to be bullied. I was always one of the smartest in my class, but I was still popular and ended up being a cheerleader and all that cr*p. But I never bullied anyone either...I had friends in many different "groups".

Reading your stories though makes me concerned about one of my children. I think perhaps he's experiencing some bullying...yeah, he's the one who's arm was broken at school right before Christmas break by some boys who were playing a bit too rough. :mad2: So thanks for sharing your experiences because I'm going to seriously look at what's going on with him.:group:

I hope you can find out what is going on with him Faren, and help him if he is being bullied. I often think that being listened to and understood would have helped me a lot. My parents did try BTW, they just couldn't get through to me, because at the time they found out I was being bullied it had gone on for a very long time. I was very good at hiding what was going on.

:bouncy: :bouncy: :bouncy:

[Faren]

Everything seems to be ok with him, Elisabetha. We do have a parent-teacher conference next week and I'll be interested in hearing what they have to say.